Deep in flavor. Deep in your mind.

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

"Thirty-Nine" Kaplowitz Radio

"Thirty-Nine"

I smoke an Illusione Ultra whilst waking up to a cup of coffee. I also read and discuss the news of:
  • WWE (Cena, Reigns, Lesnar, 'Taker)
  • Black Panther and White People
  • JC Newman and the Tampa Rays stadium
  • Kevin Smith's "widow-maker" heart attack
  • Star Wars and Jedi powers
I also add a personal touch via:
  • Clearance hoodies, a dream deferred
  • 2nd-hand skateboard shopping
  • Fingerless gloves 
MORE!!! ...

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NOTICE:
This is my final post before going into a writing hiatus which shall last until the 28th of this month. Podcasts, during this time, shall continue as ever. Every Wednesday a Kaplowitz Radio. Every Friday a Stick Men. I'll write at ya 3/1/18.

Sunday, February 25, 2018

Padron 1964 Anniversary (Natural) No. 4 - Cigar Review by Kaplowitz



WRAPPER: Nicaraguan
BINDER: Nicaraguan
FILLER: Nicaraguan

STRENGTH: Medium-Full
FORMAT: #4 6.5x60
ORIGIN: Nicaragua

FINAL GRADE: A (I got carried away w/ +in vid. - EDITOR)
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

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NOTICE:
This is my final post before going into a writing hiatus which shall last until the 28th of this month. Podcasts, during this time, shall continue as ever. Every Wednesday a Kaplowitz Radio. Every Friday a Stick Men. I'll write at ya 3/1/18.

Gran Habano S.T.K. Black Dahlia - Cigar Review

Me taking the "info" and running with it...
whilst leaving the "tainment" in the dust.
Hey, I'm still on [writing] hiatus.



WRAPPER: Nicaraguan Shade Grown Corojo
BINDER: Nicaraguan/Habano (double/binder)
FILLER: Habano, Nicaraguan Cubito, Colombian, Costa Rican,

STRENGTH: Medium (forgot to mention in vid. - EDITOR)
FORMAT: Robusto
ORIGIN: GR Tabaqueras Unidas factory, Danli, Honduras

FINAL GRADE: B+
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

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NOTICE:
This is my final post before going into a writing hiatus which shall last until the 28th of this month. Podcasts, during this time, shall continue as ever. Every Wednesday a Kaplowitz Radio. Every Friday a Stick Men. I'll write at ya 3/1/18.

To-day is my fucking birthday.

Wednesday, February 21, 2018

"Grand, or More" Kaplowitz Radio: February 21, 2018

"Grand, or More" Kaplowitz Radio: February 21, 2018


Wherein I read more from an overview of b0tched; my upcoming bit of post-apocalyptic meta-fiction absurdist serial goodness. Also, I return to my Kaplowitz Reads Kaplowitz format and dryly-so narrate cigar reviews of:
  • My Father The Judge
  • Nick & Jim's PBE
  • Bespoke Gran Mareva
  • Torano Blue
  • Don Pepin Cuban Classic
  • MBombay Mora
[All these reviews can be read by searching for them in the search field to yer right.]

I also take a (re)look at a Gilberto Oliva Reserva Blanc in real-time and remind ya to listen to the latest Podcast offerings I have to offer. Thanks for listening, Gentlepersons!

Visit my presenting sponsor: www.illusionecigars.com
& supporting sponsor: www.cigarscity.com

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NOTICE:
This is my final post before going into a writing hiatus which shall last until the 28th of this month. Podcasts, during this time, shall continue as ever. Every Wednesday a Kaplowitz Radio. Every Friday a Stick Men. I'll write at ya 3/1/18.

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

"Wrong Places?" Kaplowitz Radio: February 14, 2018


Recorded very early on a colder than nun's snatch Tuesday, whilst smoking a Cohiba Puro Dominicana in Toro format (which I discuss) I too discuss:
  • My upcoming hiatus
  • My upcoming post-apocalyptic meta-fiction foray
  • Star Wars from the Game of Thrones guys
  • The Ring of Honor Wrestling network
  • The Han Solo forthcoming flick
  • Hulk Hogan returning to WWE?
  • The Golden Girls theme-song sung in drag
Thanks for tuning in, gentlepersons!


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Tuesday, February 13, 2018

My Father Cigars The Judge - Cigar Review

NOTES:
Seams open slightly a tick on ahead'a char. Press holds gate-to-wire as does its pre-light med+ density of pack. Draws smoothly through a m+ tension. Burns without the need for re-direction and at a nice leisurely pace. Ash just might build the length of the thing, if that were yer particular fetish.

KAPLOWITZ SCALE
[k=least, Z=most]
(lead note)
sweetness: W (molasses)
sourness: L (chemically)
saltiness: O (attached to alomond note)
bitterness: I (dark chocolate)
savoriness: W (smoked meat)
pungency: I (red pepper)

A barely tamed spiciness settles back into a still quite m.full dark chocolate. Beneath that bold tandem lays another of only slightly more shyness and of sweet meat additions. The rest is beneath and beneath again and it would certainly seem it is indeed "Turtles all the way down." Body is a bit less than the flavor height might suggest, settling to a medium but robustly-so. The feeling is left that there needs to be more meat on this Judge's bones. A barely moderately lengthed finish, unfortunately, builds the chemical dalliances. Strength is a gentlemanly dockworker, A plumber whom quotes Shakespeare. Lettuce label it a m.full, mildly-so. Complexities here are too fleeting to stave off a rather linear affair, which is how its balance is attained/maintained well 'nuff.

WRAPPER: Ecuadorian Sumatra
BINDER: Nicaraguan Criollo & Corojo
FILLER: Nicaraguan

STRENGTH: Med.-Full
FORMAT: 656 Toro Box Press
ORIGIN: Tabacalera Cubana S.A. “My Father” Esteli, Nicaragua

FINAL THOUGHTS:
A nice cigar with a couple of glimpses into brilliance which are frustratingly fleeting. What lingers instead is a slight and bothersome diesel sharp-sour note. There is a build-up of bitter tar in the 3/3 which more than a single purging abates. This is no La Opulencia, Gentlepersons. This is a cigar which was unveiled at a more opportune time than that; thus garnering Cigar Aficionado's 2017 #7 nod.

FINAL GRADE: B+
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

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"I'm on Disability!" Kaplowitz Radio: February 7, 2018 


NOTICE:
This is my final post before going into a writing hiatus which shall last until the 28th of this month. Podcasts, during this time, shall continue as ever. Every Wednesday a Kaplowitz Radio. Every Friday a Stick Men. I'll write at ya 3/1/18.

Monday, February 12, 2018

Nick & Jim's P.B.E - Cigar Review (Audio)

Nick & Jim P.B.E - Cigar Review (Audio)

NOTES:
combustion
low LOW-MEDIUM medium medium-high high
construction
low low-medium MEDIUM medium-high high

KAPLOWITZ SCALE
<K=least, Z=most>
(primary note)
sweetness: O (cocoa butter)
sourness: W (white grape/berry-something)
saltiness: P (carried by cedar)
bitterness: O (coffee)
savoriness: P (suede)
pungency: L (w.pepper)

WRAPPER: Ecuadorian
BINDER: Ecuadorian
FILLER: Nicaraguan and Peruvian

STRENGTH: Light-Medium
FORMAT: 654 Toro (closed foot)
ORIGIN: Costa Rico
NAME DROPS: Nick Syris & “Island Jim” Robinson

FINAL GRADE: B
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

IN ADDITION:
Please allow me to quote me: 
"Originally unveiled as Lavida Isla, a collaboration from Nick Syris of LH Premium Cigars and “Island” Jim Robinson of Leaf & Bean, will begin shipping in a matter of days. After being renamed as Nick & Jim’s P.B.E. (Pre-Band Edition). This apparently to make lemonade from some sorta lemons. As to the blend, it's offered in a single 654 Toro format of a blend consisting of Ecuadorian top-leaf, and I can't find more info. Originally birthed as an L&B exclusive, the duo decided to release it to other accounts. Robinson's distribution company will distribute." (Cigar News Weekly Report: December 17, 2017)

Git yer own LH Premium Nick & Jim's P.B.E. Toro at Cigars City. I did.

BONUS CONTENT:
Stick Men: A Nicaragua Travel Tale 

Bespoke Cigars Gran Mareva - Cigar Review

NOTES:
For all intents and purposes and really as well as truly a flawless bit of combustion/construction is on display here in this Bespoke Gran Mareva offering. Although as a reviewer of some sadly minuscule repute I shall offer thin bitching re: a sometimes almost lag to top-leaf and not quite razor-line burn.
  • Peppers (white, red, and bell)
  • Cream 
  • Spices (cinnamon, clove)
  • Chocolate (milk & cocoa butter)
  • Coffee (loaded diner-style joe)
  • Cedar, sweetly spiced
  • Honey (orange blossom w/ malt attachment)
  • Caramel
  • Almond extract
  • Chamomile tea
  • Dirt
  • Sand (from private beach)
FINAL THOUGHTS:
Verily a brightly complex thing, this. Balanced supremely-so and ending in a sweet floral finish with surprisingly long legs. This Gran Mareva has an early inside track on my second Cigar of the Year in a row that is of the Bespoke varietal. Here's a link to my Cigar of the Year 2016-17 post. Friggin' try this brand, Gentlepersons.

WRAPPER: Brazilian
BINDER: Dominican
FILLER: Dominican Republic, Nicaragua, USA

STRENGTH: Medium
FORMAT: Corona w/ pig-tail cap & closed foot
BLENDER: Hendrik Kelner, Jr.
ORIGIN: KBF factory, Santiago, Dominican Republic

FINAL GRADE: A+
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

Get yer own Bespoke Cigars Gran Mareva the same way I did, from Cigars City.

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"I'm on Disability!" Kaplowitz Radio: February 7, 2018 

Sunday, February 11, 2018

Torano Vault E-021 Blue - Cigar Review

NOTES:
Pre-light stretched seam stretches more as char approaches its spot in mid 1/3. I saw binder, Gentlepersons. All told the blemish gets burnt smoothly through, humsoever. A straight burn, at that and clear-thru. No hard soft spots in a density which remains a well-packed medium= firmness gate to cool wire.

KAPLOWITZ SCALE
[k=least, Z=most]
(lead note)
sweetness: O (caramel)
sourness: W (weak coffee)
saltiness: I (w/ cardboard lilt)
bitterness: P (orange pith)
savoriness: P (oats)
pungency: L (w. pepper draw, r. pepper r/h.)

Flavors are a medium-level'd delivery of a sour-sweet profile. A bit of cream seems to be nipped at pre-bud by a cardboard entrant which sucks most of the moisture out, leaving a dried palate in its wake to the tune of a med. body. The finish doesn't hang around much at all but the bit it does shows a simple and petering extension of draw. Strength fails to move the strength-o-meter needle more than a fleeting hare. A straight-forward affair which wobbles out of initial balance and never evens back-out.

WRAPPER: Ecuadorian Sumatra
BINDER: Connecticut Broadleaf
FILLER: Dominican Republic, Honduras, Nicaragua

STRENGTH: Medium
FORMAT: Robusto
ORIGIN: Nicaragua

FINAL THOUGHTS:
A 2017  General Cigar Co. addition to the Torano Vault line and one which makes me wonder if it were better off kept locked away. All-told, a bland offering controlled by an unfortunate cardboard note. Packaging/presentation-wise, the obvious lifting of the 'new' Camacho band design is nice -- wait. No it ain't.

FINAL GRADE: B
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

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"I'm on Disability!" Kaplowitz Radio: February 7, 2018


Thursday, February 08, 2018

Don Pepin Garcia Cuban Classic 1979 "Black" - Cigar Review

Rumor has it that CM Punk looks to be landing his second UFC bout, 'gainst Mike Jackson in June/Chicago. Lettuce stick to the stick, humsoever. I'll leave the superfluous to cigar blog stuffs in my Things I Cared About This Month Other Than Cigars postings. (There's only one published thus far.)

The Don Pepin Garcia Cuban Classic: Burns on a straight line with occasional slight jagged and blistered ticks. Two teeny-tiny re-directs are mildly needed. Ash builds well to an inch of oily tight dime-stack exterior, dry interior. There is a cleaving of them burnt-offerings in the 1/3 only. Draws superbly even off a medium+ tension through-out. Assemblage is excellent the entire experience.

KAPLOWITZ SCALE
[k=least, Z=most]
sweetness: W
sourness: L
saltiness: P
bitterness: W
savoriness: W
pungency: W

A full-flavored affair, this Don Pepin Garcia Cuban Classic. Body is a full medium, smooth of texture, mainly -- with a spicy tingle. Mouth warms a hair in the 3/3, un-egregiously-so. Tongue tingles gate-to-wire. Finishes in a great length of sweetly pungent savoriness. Strength is a medium, robustly-so. Beads of schvitz form 'neath my 'stache stubble on a coolish morn. Beautifully complex and supremely balanced, wherein even the lesser sour and salty notes play important roles.
  • Peppercorn
  • Red pepper
  • Earth (top-soil)
  • Wood (cedar & oak)
  • Leather, stiffly-so
  • Spice (cinnamon, clove, nutmeg)
  • Chocolate (baking & semi-sweet)
  • Meat, smoked
  • Nuts (toasted almond & black walnut)
  • Prune
  • Citrus (orange pith)
  • Manure
  • Charcoal
  • Compost
WRAPPER: Nicaraguan Corojo
BINDER: Nicaraguan
FILLER: Nicaraguan

STRENGTH: Medium-Full
FORMAT: Robusto
ORIGIN: My Father Cigars S.A. Esteli, Nicaragua

FINAL GRADE: A-
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

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Stick Men: Episode Five

Wednesday, February 07, 2018

"I'm on Disability!" Kaplowitz Radio: February 7, 2018



Wherein I smoke and offer-up my thoughts on a Flatbed Cigar Co. Panacea Billboard cigar. I also riff-off the following headlines:
  • Joshua-Parker showdown lands on Showtime
  • 'Star Wars: The Last Jedi' Wins Best Movie for Grownups Award
  • Hatton Very Concerned About Tyson Fury Making a Comeback
  • Bill Burr Regrets Coming On TV After The Patriots' Super Bowl Loss
  • Photographer Shares Polaroids of NYC's 1970s Punk Rock Scene on Instagram
  • WWE Raw results, recap: Roman Reigns pulls double duty, women shine all night
Also, please to remember that this blog will be on hiatus from 2/14-2/28.

Thanks for the loaning of yer ears, gentlepersons.

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Tuesday, February 06, 2018

Flatbed Cigar Co. Track 7 2:46 BP - Cigar Review Redux (Audio)

I originally reviewed this Flatbed Track 7 offering HERE.
Click play below for the Redux:



Herein which, I take a (re)looksie at the thing and respond as well, to the following headlines via Google News:
  • Chris Jericho has a very good idea for improving promos in WWE
  • Morning Report: UFC middleweight champion Robert Whittaker breaks silence on health scare
  • Rian Johnson Explains #35: Here's Why Han's Funeral Never Made It Into The Last Jedi
  • Groves-Eubank - Zach Parker Finalized as Reserve For Their Fight
FINAL (re)GRADE: B+
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59
(as to the cigar at-hand)

Flatbed Cigar Co.
Track 7 2:46 BP
5 x 60 box-press

WRAPPER: Arapiraca Maduro
BINDER: Dominican
FILLER: Dominican Ligero, Seco & Nicaraguan Ligero
STRENGTH: MEDIUM
ORIGIN: Dominican Republic

Thanks for listening, Gentlepersons. PLEASE SUBSCRIBE to this blog by dropping yer email addy in the box to your right. Get all my writing, audio, and video dalliances delivered right to ya inbox.

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Monday, February 05, 2018

MBombay Mora - Cigar Review Redux

Why, yes. I am aware that Ronda Rousey is now in the WWE fold.
Lettuce now take a (re)looksie at the Mora blend from one of my fav brands, MBombay Tobak.

NOTES:
Combustion and construction each operate on sans opportunity to kvetch. Burns on a straight-line at a very nice pace. No hard/soft spots nor loosening of seams, draw remains a cool temp'd medium tension through-out. Excellent smoke out-put both active and passive satiate/saturate well both palate and porch.

Predominately a sweet and sunny stick which never gets so ooey-gooey as to block out some quite nice complexities. Moderately pungent bits are steered by a steering sour/bitter tandem which builds in nuance as its bitternesses toast calmly along. Sour-half features a nifty salted attachment. A back-bone of natural 'baccy with savory core functions as a grand stage for the players and their supremely balanced routine.

Quite flavorful insofar as array of notes, delivered at a medium height. Body hits a smooth medium-full in a pungent and savory manner. This MBombay Mora gives just the zetz a' strength you need to have as a reminder that you're smoking... no more, no less. Mild-medium there, Gentlepersons.

WRAPPER: Dominican Republic
BINDER: Ecuador
FILLER: Ecuador, Peru, Dominican Republic

STRENGTH: Medium
FORMAT: Toro (shaggy foot)
ORIGIN: Costa Rica

FINAL GRADE: A-
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

I reviewed the Mora Lancero HERE.

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Stick Men: Episode Five

Sunday, February 04, 2018

Cigar News Weekly Report: February 4, 2018

TABACALERA LA FLOR S.A.

La Flor Dominicana's factory, Tabacalera La Flor S.A., is currently expanding its facilities and production capabilities. The company is expanding its existent rolling room atop recently purchased adjacent land. In the end, this will be to the tune of an add'l 10k square feet, which is expected to increase out-put by 30%. Said end (of construction) is due by Feb/March.

Upon completion, some 40 new rollers will be employed and are already being trained even now, as you don't read this post and are instead watching several hours of Super Bowl pre-game hype.

BLACK WORKS STUDIO S&R

Black Works Studios first announced their Serpents and Rainbows (S&R) offering back in July 2016. Finally now, the James Brown co. has announced its widespread release. To select retailers. Wide(r than before)spread? The blend consists of a Sumatra top-leaf over Nicaraguan Habano binder with Nica and DR guts. It is rolled at the Fabrica Oveja Negra factory in EstelĂ­, Nicaragua in Lancero and Corona Gorda formats.

20ct. boxes with an MSRP of 9.50USD per stick.

SCANDINAVIAN TOBACCO GROUP, THOMPSON

Scandinavian Tobacco Group (STG) has 'entered an agreement to acquire' Thompson and Co. (catalog retail biggie) for a cool $62M. Thompson boasts net sales of over $100M and 185 employees. STG, in turn, is the momma co. of some Mom & Pop operation named General Cigar Company. Ya may've heard of them.

This deal includes all of Thompson's retail sites and stores, their Tampa call center, and many shop exclusive blends.

QUALITY IMPORTERS, XIKAR

Quality Importers Trading Company, an entity still a bit under the radar even after their acquisition of Palio and Orleans Group, has now added XIKAR Inc. to its portfolio. This done-so by QI in conjunction with Svoboda Capital Partners LLC.

Co-founders of XIKAR, Kurt Van Kepler and Scott Almsberger, are now newly-minted Executive Vice Presidents/minority owners whom shall continue to run XIKAR ops. as minority partners.

CROWNED HEADS

Crowned heads has announced a Canadian distribution deal, and its pending intro into that chilly in many a way market. I still do not know why co-founder/owner Mr. Jon Huber unfollowed me on Twitter (@KapAdamsPeter).

CALDWELL

In news from someone who still does follow me on Twitter (@KapAdamsPeter) Caldwell Cigars has announced that its parent co. Down&Back, LLC, is the new U.S. distributor for Porsche Design smoking accessories. Yes, THAT Porche. Look for a greater Brick & Mortar presence coming soon.

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Stick Men: Episode Five

Thursday, February 01, 2018

La Palina Classic Rosado (2017) - Cigar Review

Watch me 'explode' these...
NOTES:
burn-line
After a Bic-flicking correction of potential canoe outta the gate, there is a self-settling at the end of the 1/3 and on-out. Perfection ain't achieved, humsoever, as slight ribboning does occur hither-thither.

ash
Forms in loosely aerated medium-dark grey mottled clumps which only once makes to an inch of build.

draw
Smooth even pulls are a high-light of this La Palina Classic Rosado. 'Tis a bit open for my liking, at the left-side of a medium tension, but still quite nice a delivery.

seams
Fast and firm, is how the roll holds. Seams are all but invisible pre-light and tighten as the shaft heats via progression.

density
Medium+ packing firmness and evenly-so from pre-toast through 1/3. From 2/3 on, there is a tick of softening ~1" ahead of mascara. 

pacing
A moderate rate of speed with no gas or brake pumpings.

smoky-smoke
Fairly voluminous off the resting foot and a nigh ninja smoke-screen off the pull. Aroma is a quite malt-forward natural 'baccy. 

temp
As cool as Billy Dee Williams shilling shit malt liquor, gate-to-wire.

KAPLOWITZ SCALE 
[K=least, Z=most]
(lead)
sweetness: W (milk chocolate)
sourness: I (weak coffee)
saltiness: P (salt) (duh)
bitterness: A (citrus pith)
savoriness: L (leather)
pungency: A (white pepper)

texture 
Verily smooth, even through the schnoz.

weight 
Light but saturating if not satiating.

balance 
Lacking in bitterness and savoriness -- yet intentionally-so. 

complexity 
The malt attachment to sweet&sour notes staves off tedium.

finish 
Short-lived natural tobacco, pleasantly 'nuff.

WRAPPER: Honduran Rosado
BINDER: Honduran
FILLER: Dominican, Nicaraguan, Honduran

STRENGTH: Mild-Medium
FORMAT: Toro
ORIGIN: Dominican Republic

FINAL GRADE: B
A 90-100 B 80-89 C 70-79 D 60-69 F 0-59

MY FINAL THOUGHT WRAPPED UP IN ONE WORD: sensationally-unsensational.


Halfwheel did a nice write-up about the La Palina core line revamp HERE.

LISTEN:
"Willing Toupee" Kaplowitz Radio: January 31, 2018