Deep in flavor. Deep in your mind.

6/20/16

Weekly Boxing Review for June 20, 2016 - Cu-Avana Punisher Shorty


THE CIGAR
Cu-Avana Punisher Shorty
4 1/2 x 60
w. Habano
b./f. Nicaraguan

I blind-reviewed a previous peppery Punisher perusal pHERE.

The ACCOMPANYING LIBATION
Spot of tea
PG Tips
Sprinkle of Stevia
(Think of this tea as the 5 Vegas High Primings of tea, hence "Tips.") 

&
A handful of Planters dry roasted peanuts.

Now lettuce talk boxing. Shall we gentlepersons?
KOVALEV-WARD SET 
Contingent upon each pugilist winning their lead-in fights, Sergey Kovalev (29-0-1&26) versus Andre Ward (29-0-0&15) is a done deal for the City of Lost Wages on November 19th. 

I wet the cap of this Cu-Avana in my mouth and it burns my tongue. What's wrong with me? Why do I do this to myself? Hi. My name is Kaplowitz, and thanks for stopping by www.kaplowitz.xyz -- yer place on the world wide web to celebrate Shemp's last day. Cigars, boxing, horse racing, and jokes...  all with an air of vaudeville and lilt of Yiddish. 

On wooden match light, I get the sensation of a Mexican dinner served on a too hot restaurant plate. Don't tell me not to touch it. Don't make it so hot! Also, don't tell me to not think of an elephant, will ya? But the dinner, it's all there, con carne. Green chili peppers, sour cream, I even sense beans. Black. There's even a rough salted starch... tortilla? ... on the retrohale. A 1/4" later, there's cinnamon led red spices and all the rest of the peppers. Black, red, white. White finds some dried red/purple fruit and lingers into the vanilla vibe'd finish. Habanero and jalapeno join in. I'm schvitzing here!

This Kovalev-Ward bout is definitely a tough piece of pugilism to predict. I will hold my own official prediction for a pre-fisticuffs Kibbitz. I will say that for Ward to garner victory, he needs to be sharp. A warm-up fight is good news to that end. I will also say that I am surprised by a popular sentiment stating Ward will show Kovalev defensive wares which he's not yet seen. Krusher saw an awful lotta that against B-hop. While Mr. Bernard Hopkins lacked any discernible power, Ward's gloves ain't exactly thunderous. In short, Ward may be thought too highly of, and Kovalev not highly 'nuff... in terms of boxing IQ.

Another tough aspect to predict is the actual mainstream allure of what most are considering a super-fight. Mr. Ward oft has trouble drawing ants to a pic-a-nic and I am unsure as to Mr. Kovalev's transcendence to the typical American living room. Don't get me wrong, it will be a fantastic match to see, and one which will be very good for the sport of boxing. Humsover, I am a tick tentative to deem it very good for the business of boxing -- insofar as pulling in fringe or the more casual of fans.

I have made a comparison betwixt Andre Ward and Bernard Hopkins regarding power. Let me say too that Mr. Ward is a bigger fella with I daresay the ability in his punches to keep Mr. Kovalev honest as ol' Abe Lincoln. I just don't believe he'll surprise him. Transversely, he very well stands to be surprised by Mr. Kovalev's heavy handedness.  Too, I believe Krusher to be more than just some seek and destroy pugilist who tries to sell me his line of workout clothes via sponsored Facebook posts. Truly, this'll be a heckuva prize-fight, gentlepersons, and I bet, no shortened display of one. 

Finish is shorter than the big draw notes of this Punisher Shorty would lead ya to believe. At the end of the day, this bad boy leaves a pretty clean palate. Floral notes take off in juicy dark tropical aloha ways.
SMITH JR STUNS FONFARA
Ah, but those small tune-up fights that lead to big bouts and payday matches, and bearing in mind yet again or perhaps still, that Kovalev-Ward is contingent upon two such bouts -- Mr. Andrzej Fonfara (28-4-0&16) took on one Mr. Joe Smith, Jr. (22-1-0&18) and the result was a heaping pile of shock. Mr. Fonfara was definitely caught as much by Mr. Smith's heavy right and then thunderous left hook, as he was by his own looking ahead to avenging an Adonis Stevenson unanimous decision loss. He was dropped twice in the opening round via showing a complete who'da thunk lack of respect for Joe's obvious power. Smith v Stevenson, gentlepersons?

A wood which was in the underbelly of scorched compost comes up and distinguishes as a well-seasoned cedar. Dark roasted coffee cooked in a cowboy manner over a hickory campfire, that's happening now. Mouth tingles out onto lips and then threatens my chin. There are some whom say these are schmeared with pepper juice. There are some whom say they are not. All told, there ain't a lot said on these that ain't half rumor. Me? I hate a good mystery. Licorice! Didn't cowboys eat licorice? It's very cowboy, this Punisher. No... bandit. NO! BANDITO!!! Pass me another taco, hombre... and an Alka-Seltzer, boychik.

Ash falls off in a surprise hot oil clump. Shaft is warming, too. I think I'll allow it a tick of a siesta. The PG, gentlepersons, actually holds up well, and the pinch of Stevia gives a bissell sweet zetz. Line is mainly even. Some softening has occurred, but draw has always been a medium+ tension and seams doth holdeth. I get some very dark rich chocolate I don't recall having in the first offering. That said, I don't read my stuff. Good deal of sweet here now; sweat too -- as the peppers ain't dialed back a bit.

Please allow me to say that I do not foretell either Ward or Kovalev falling prey in this way. We will be treated to this match, have no fear. There ain't no turning back now... as neither participant goes by the nom de ring of Canelo.
KHAN WANTS GARCIA NEXT
Burn slows, shaft stays warm, but in the 3/3 of a four incher -- there ain't a lotta wiggle. Tea is splendid. The Punisher finishes cleanly and the tea sits nicely there. While this 'un is sweeter than the last, the sweetness is less delineated. I can't help but wonder if my libation -- any libation -- muddies up the salivas. Mouth-feel is clean and not as tingly as you might think with all the peppers. Great moisture level there. 

I ain't happy about how Mr. Amir "King" Khan (31-4-0&19) lost to Mr. Saul "Canelo" Alvarez (47-1-1&33)... via predatorial match-making... but since when did it become OK to challenge for a strap, fresh off a lights-out loss? Answer: the WBC kept Khan in the #1 contender slot for Mr. Danny Garcia's (32-0-0&18) 147lb. crown. The good news is that it's a better weight vicinity for Khan, and also an opponent that won't have the power to brutalize more brain-cells on his way to a 12rd split-decision. (Unofficial prediction.) Khan will win the first forty-nine per cent of the bout, the last fifty-one serve to sady highlight Mr. Khan's decent. Albeit less dramatically so than a vicious knock-out.

Line is more even. Pack softening has ceased. My lips and around 'em more than make up for the surprising lack of mouth tingle. I feel somewhat wind-burnt. Nub is hot but smoke is cool... but kinda burns, anyways. There's dos scoops of raisins at the band(ito). 
[cigar nub photo missing]
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EDITOR'S NOTE
You can now listen to an audio version of this post HERE.