Monday, December 12, 2022

Another Message from Kaplowitz Media. Books About HOW TO ENJOY A CIGAR (Excerpt Included)

Another Message from Kaplowitz Media. Books About HOW TO ENJOY A CIGAR

BUY MY BOOK. That's right, there are still remaining copies of HOW TO ENJOY A CIGAR. Not only that, but I just might maybe have time to get it to where you need it in order to suit your yuletide purposes. To procure yours today, write me at kaplowitzmedia(at)yahoo(dot)com. Do not delay!

HOW TO ENJOY A CIGAR: A chapbook meant to be read in roughly the time it takes to enjoy a premium cigar. Perhaps your first cigar, or fifteenth, or a reset of sorts after years of smoking--in the further pursuit of your enjoyment. Bogged down with neither jargon nor lingo but designed to impart upon the reader what they need to know in order to get the most from their smoking experience.

Troubleshooting tips, storage ideas, how to taste, etiquette notions, and a couple-few memoir-style yarns--How to Enjoy a Cigar will make the perfect gift for the cigar guy (or gal) in your life. Or just get a copy for yourself; there's no shame in treating numero uno in an appropriate fashion. 'Tis the season!

I understand people appreciate reading excerpts. Here's one from HOW TO ENJOY A CIGAR by me, Kaplowitz Media.

"Now comes the cut. It could be awkward at first if I recall correctly. Bullshit yourself calm by again smelling the shaft of the cigar. Now the foot. Still smells like a cigar, right? Always has. Good news is you got that down pat. Why not smell again the filler tobacco at the foot? Get in there. Now you look like you know something. Fake it till ya make it! If you need to again be told to take the cellophane off first, put this small book calmly down and walk into the ocean. Still, we aren’t born knowing how to do this. Hold the cigar in your non-dominant hand and your cutter in your dominant hand.

"You should be looking at either a single or double-bladed apparatus. If not, use your dominant hand to throw the blasted thing out the window. Now regroup. Decorum! The key is to snip off as little from the cap as is possible–we just need to get a bit of airflow. Most cigars have a slight taper to them there, just snip above that. Remove the top-most leaf. It’s actually a separate bit of leaf, affixed there via vegetal pectin and all on its lonesome. Simply and slowly align. Let ‘er rip. No twisting, straight-ahead. Boop. There should still be a bit of a visible taper remaining, that’s called the shoulder. Did you boop yet? Do it. Nice. Bob’s yer uncle. Although these days, who knows?"

That email again is kaplowitzmedia(at)yahoo(dot)com

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