Thursday, November 10, 2022

Thoughts on The Queer Feet from The Innocence of Father Brown by GK Chesterton

Thoughts on The Queer Feet from The Innocence of Father Brown by GK Chesterton

First published in The Saturday Evening Post (October 1, 1910) and then in The Story-Teller magazine (November 1910). Afterward, in The Innocence of Father Brown collection (1911). This edition: The Complete Father Brown Mysteries (Carousel Books, 2021) SPOILERS AHEAD?

"Because silver is sometimes more valuable than gold," said the priest mildly; "that is, in large quantities."

Finally, an explanation as to why "The Twelve True Fishermen" all wear green and not black. I've positively always wondered. I bet it's a British racing green colour like the paint on a Jag-u-ar. I'm not a car guy, but I've always wanted one of those. Beige interior. Oh but the explanation... it's so as not to be mistaken for a waiter. We'll get to that in a tick. Not just theft is in the cards here but also socio-economics, de facto caste systems, the way the upper class views the lower, vice-versa, and even--well, that's about it.

It's also about a heist. A silver heist. A silverware heist. I seem to recall an episode of The Golden Girls wherein Sophia steals some forks and spoons with the help of her odd wicker purse. This crime is far more serious than that. Far more. Also, less successful (I believe Sophia played for keeps) thanks to Father Brown. The criminal is none other than Flambeau, that tall, lithe, imposing son of a gun. "I am a priest, Monsieur Flambeau," said Brown, "and I am ready to hear your confession."

But why doesn't Flambeau seem to recognize Father Brown here? Did the previous events of The Blue Cross not happen yet? No, that doesn't jive. Is this a significant goof? Probably not. It's more than likely a further fleshing-out of exactly how unassuming and unremarkable our little priest friend truly is. He is utterly forgettable. Yet he most assuredly remembers.

Although this is the best option, I find myself buying it only a tick more than the fly in the ointment of The Shawshank Redemption... EVERYONE LOOKS AT EVERYONE'S SHOES. But here we must recall while these tales are 'real' as in not supernatural, they also can rightly be seen as partly fables, parables, and/or allegories. It's really quite a charming manner in which to spin a yarn. However, in Shawshank, it remains completely and utterly unforgivable.

The said yarn itself isn't a complicated one. Hercule Poirot... I mean Flambeau... somewhat takes the place of a dead waiter while blending with the lauded guests and starts his pilfering of silver as Father Brown sits listening on, putting pen to paper the dead man's final words. The master-of-disguise Colossus of Crime's footsteps gave away his rather simple rouse. He stepped like both a fat cat puffing a cigar, as well as a briskly attentive servant. It's almost comedic and, in fact, GK Chesterton is at least somewhat a humorist at least by nature if not as obvious by letter.

Elsewhere within, The Vernon Hotel offers a lesson in elite-luxury marketing in an 'oligarchical society' in that it turns away more guests than it accepts by limiting its own attainability, or to phrase it more perfectly and completely, "If there were a fashionable hotel in London which no man could enter who was under six foot, society would meekly make up parties of six-foot men to dine in it." It is of note that the silverware belongs to the club and not the hotel.

The 'appalling' hotel then. This 'palace of pleasures,' is somewhat of a not-so-innocent bystander, perhaps. It feeds and also eats from the system, one might say if one (I, of Jewish heritage) was not quite as clever as one believes themself to be. Mr. Lever, 'a Jew,' owns the establishment and is painted as "a kind man, and had also that bad imitation of kindness, the dislike of any difficulty or scene." Amazingly and quite tellingly, it is Father Brown who is vulgar in this setting.

"Odd, isn't it," he said, "that a thief and a vagabond should repent, when so many who are rich and secure remain hard and frivolous, and without fruit for God or man." Father Brown allowed Flambeau to depart sans loot and capture. Then he too bid his adieu, humbly and tight-lipped and in search of a penny omnibus. Thus ending a simple and yet quite brilliantly hopeful and slightly whimsical little tale. At once nothing special and also something incredibly special. Further spoiler alert, Father will befriend the criminal before saving him.

"The story which Father Brown was writing down was very likely a much better story than this one, only it will never be known." Says the particularly God-voiced (omniscient third-person) narrator. Now ain't that something? & it's the most believable line in this piece. Simply because this isn't just some frivolous story.

Previously: Thoughts on The Secret Garden from The Innocence of Father Brown by GK Chesterton

Next: Thoughts on The Flying Stars From The Innocence of Father Brown by GK Chesterton

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