Excerpt V from the Kaplowitz Media. Unnamed Cigar Dictionary Project

lo-fi & lovely

Excerpt V from the Kaplowitz Media. Unnamed Cigar Dictionary Project (UCD)

::: EXCERPT :::

Maduro In a rudimentary manner, a dark-colored cigar. A hotter and longer fermentation period is what’s at play in truer forms. In cases of that, characteristics involve deeper, sweeter flavors. Maduro literally means mature... think of it in terms of ripe. I’ll take a moment to state here that a dark cigar is no indication of strength any more than a lighter shade surely indicates mildness.

In instances wherein shortcuts were employed in order to mimic the Maduro complexion… well, let’s just say I’ve rolled what looked to dye off some “maduros” that had played suspiciously upon my vaulted palate.

A note about hue not signaling strength. I will say that it isn't the terrible guide many (including myself in the portion above) claim it to be--it's just not fool-proof to assume the darker a cigar the stronger it is. Like anything else, there are exceptions. I do know that from reading older cigar materials, say from the 80s-90s, they do, in fact, state the paler a cigar the milder (which is still more the case). I will look into this further but my guess is that things change over time and also that I'll forget to look into this further. 

Nub The last little bit of a cigar. The part from the band-point on-down. A term used as a point of the cigar smoking experience–not in the anatomy of a cigar, per se. 

Nubbing The act of smoking the Nub. Please refrain from actually saying this. Thank you. 

Some small much is made on instruments and tools that are geared toward enabling nubbing. Ornate spears are often bejeweled and the like. Some use a humble corn cob holder. My personal preference is to be even more humble if I must brag. The lowly toothpick is my nubbing tool of choice. 

I also use a toothpick, on occasion, to free up a plugged cigar. Sure there are specific tools with teeth and greater length–but with that comes the greater likelihood of a FUBAR cigar. Toothpicks, am I right? Of course, I am. Plugged cigars are briefly mentioned in the Dry Draw entry as well as in its own entry.

"I'm nubbing it, Broski! I should get another out of my humi! EPIC" Fratboys never die they just grow old and make other people want to die.

Oil In well-kept cigars of certain leaf types in particular, oils are exuded from inside to out–as exuding would denote. A healthy sheen is, well, healthy. It does bear mentioning that plume exists no more than do unicorns. More on this ever-touchy subject in the Plume entry. Suffice to say here, it is always mold, that plume you seem so proud of.

"Is this plume or mold?" A popular question in the cigar world, on par with "Cello on or cello off?" I'm just super unsure why it is people still ask these questions over and over again in forums and groups. Did you mean to type that into a Google search, Broski? See: Cellophane and Aging entries... wait, this is all italicized. Fuck. See FONT GUIDE BELOW

::: BONUS MATERIAL :::

Cellophane (or cello) is the clear plastic sleeve that individually wraps many cigars not of Cuban origin. Except for that it is not plastic at all. True cellophane is plant matter (cellulose) and is breathable. Cello comes in handy in protecting against ham-fisted handlings and does serve to somewhat maintain moisture levels. Is it necessary? Should you keep it on or take it off? See Box-aging under the Aging entry for more info. Unless you’re reading this straight through like a goddamned boss. In that case, you’ve read that already. Such a BOSS, you.

This is a lot of work.

Aging 

3. Box-aging is a thing done on the consumer level in their private Humidor. This can be done for years or even decades. There is some debate as to longer periods of time having a limit where at that point, the cigar’s flavors peter-out. All forms of aging are done with the goal of smoothing out profiles so as to highlight rich complexities and nuances. Another age-old debate: “Cello(phane) on or off?” sees its one definitively right or wrong across the board answer here… it is ‘cello off’ for aging. Although there are people who adamantly do not agree.

I'm gonna go take a nap.

::: FONT GUIDE :::

Excerpt from the work-in-progress book (UCD).
My thoughts on the work-in-progress book (UCD).
Italics within definitions are recommendations to see that entry.

::: WHAT DID I JUST READ? :::

As you Gentlepersons hopefully know or are at the ::: very ::: least now FINALLY aware of under that rock of yours, I am constructing a Cigar Dictionary. A book. It is yet to have been named. Its working title is "Unnamed Cigar Dictionary" (UCD). I will change that "As soon as possible" (ASAP). Nevertheless, the idea of the whole thing, the game plan, is that I will blog the process of creating & assembling the UCD on a non-scheduled basis.

Included in these blog posts will be my italicized thoughts regarding said creating & assembling process--and as we get closer to it being a book proper, the process of that, as well. THESE WILL NOT BE INCLUDED IN THE FINISHED BOOK. Please note that not everything, including the whole or part of definitions, will appear in the finished book.

To read other excerpts, search Unnamed Cigar Dictionary or UCD, in the Search Kaplowitz Media. field to the right of your screen.

I need you Gentlepersons to get excited about this and not be able to wait to purchase it--whenever it finally is completed and available for said purchasing.   

@kaplowitzmedia
Twitter | Instagram

::: very :::