THE WHISKY
Johnnie Walker
Red Label
Blended Scotch Whisky
ABV. 40%
p. 80
a. n/a
m. some 35 malts & grains.
"Johnnie Walker Red Label is our Pioneer Blend, the one that introduced our whisky to the world. Highly versatile and with universal appeal, it has a bold, distinctive flavor that shines through even when mixed. Johnnie Walker Red Label is now the best-selling Scotch Whisky around the globe. Perfect for parties and get-togethers, at home, or going out. Enjoy with friends." - www.JohnnieWalker.com
INTRO
"Bold." "Highly versatile." I suppose that sounds better than "Rough," and "Use only as a mixer." However, I like the classics. Almost especially and oddly when "Classic" can be taken simply to mean "Old." However once again and even humsover -- age oft don't happen by accident. Plus this is Dick Cheney's drink of choice, and Red appears in a George Thorogood song, so there is that and there is that.
NOSE
Young and cereal-laden. Coarse and flat all at once. Lemme let it sit a spell in my Dollar Store fluted wine glass. I saw George Thorogood perform somewhere in Chicagoland ages ago. He schvitzed for what seemed like nigh three hours. It was fun. I'm a fan. Returning to the brown water -- clear amber colored, really -- sweet perchance vanilla. Floral bits. Oak. A whiff of peat. Another whiff of peat. Repeat. Rubbing alcohol. Band-aids fresh out of their packaging.
TASTE
Thin as its legs. Sharp up-front. Sweet herbs. Almond bark to vanilla. Ginger zetz go boom. Black pepper with a bit of its own smoky under-belly. (A drop of water calms the pepper, but too the smoky. I prefer this 'un neat.) Oak. Somewhat drab, but not lifeless, per se -- that ginger zing is... refreshing? Gruff? I taste booze. Maybe even hooch.
FINISH
Dries nicely here, actually. Short stint, though. Retains some sweetness from the sip and adds a root varietal of vegetal earth note. Then it over-stays a tick; not a short 'nuff stint. Grainy. Tingly mouth-feel and a tick of a thin one. Tingle outlasts finish by a lap and there is quite a bit a' alcohol there. 
OUTRO
Budget-friendly and highly versatile. What's not to like? My tongue feels hairy and burny. Many will tells ya to spend a few shekels more on Black Label -- I'm dubious as to that. That there's a review for later, gentlepersons.
FINAL GRADE
****B-****
L'shalom