Gentlepersons, gentlepersons have more and more been asking me about my review process. Since today is Purim, my favorite Jewish holiday and the holiday of my birth, Manischewitz lays heavy on my palate. A celebratory cigar dangles from my smoke-hole -- I know an opportunity when I doth sees one.
Elaborate?
Elaborate?
- This is not a proper review setting. (Manischewitz palate, although some blasphemous cigar reviewers review while pairing.)
- This is quite a proper cigar I am smoking, and we shall get to that, uno momento. What better than enjoying a nice offering, leisurely? Using it for blog content as well, 'natch!
What is my process, then? Let's first have a look at --
THE CIGAR
Padron Cigars1964 Anniversary Series
8 1/4" x 50 Presidente, box-press
Nicaraguan (natural) wrapper
Nicaraguan binder/filler
PRE-LIGHT
Lettuce begin with pre-cigar, re: my own preparations. Firstly, I generally prefer my cigar pre-meal, as opposed to the more common post. As to reviews, I do 'em with my gut, and more importantly my palate -- on E. Before I head into my carport to hold court on an offering, I do some stuffs.
I spray out my nose with an Arm & Hammer Simply Saline mist. I then swish my mouth with whole milk, followed by water. I do not swallow -- regardless of what the public restroom graffiti may suggest. I then pour a few fingers of water into an Old Fashioned glass, and away we go.
I spray out my nose with an Arm & Hammer Simply Saline mist. I then swish my mouth with whole milk, followed by water. I do not swallow -- regardless of what the public restroom graffiti may suggest. I then pour a few fingers of water into an Old Fashioned glass, and away we go.
The water in the Old Fashion glass: if my palate dries as I smoke, and only if -- I swish. If that doesn't cure -- then and only then, do I live up to the aforementioned public restroom graffiti. Why? I don't want the milk down my throat as a coating beforehand, nor do I want to soothe with water during.
As to the cigar, my reviews go a long way toward explaining themselves. I focus first on appearance (Veins, seams, cap, any possible blemishes or high-points). Then hand-feel (packing, balance, texture, etc). Then my schnoz , both at the shaft and foot. Then, a cold-pull is noted and notated insofar as its notes. I always mention the methodology of cap removal.
Not much left to do at that point other than--
LIGHT
I make mention of the aroma let loose by toasting the foot. Too, I mention my means of arson. Here, I allow myself three hot draws prior to the official start of the opening act, or first-third. First is the initial hot pull. Second, a retro-hale. Thirdly, a third pull. I of course mention flavors and the order/delivery thereof.
I then note the construction, combustion, burn, ash, smoke out-put and room-note, offer a nascent profile and strength, and anything else which might present itself. Finally, we are proverbially seated as the metaphorical curtain lifts on the figurative set stage.
Re-touches are not down-graded in this time-slot. I typically light with wooden matches, outdoors -- thus I am forgiving.
Re-touches are not down-graded in this time-slot. I typically light with wooden matches, outdoors -- thus I am forgiving.
ACT I
ACT II
ACT III
Relating all I experience, I write in first person, present tense. This is why it's so exciting to read my write-ups, gentlepersons!!! Share them with yer pals!!!!!!
SMOKE TIME
Of course, this is where I plug in the amount of time it takes to fly from EUG to JFK. Airtime, not including layovers, but including tailwinds.
130mins on this Padron Anniversary.
130mins on this Padron Anniversary.
NOTES
Overall thoughts and schtick find their way here; along with a general summation. For instance: this Padron kept me busy re-touching its burn. All the while gifting me with smooth albeit rather common notes. Not pedestrian -- perhaps a cyclist, humsoever. Single-speed. My schmatta caught many an ash. Nice nic zetz.
PAIRINGS
Pairings are funny. I have already mentioned my dismay at reviewers whom pair whilst reviewing. Furthermore and apart from clinical review: I believe a true premium offering should not require coupling. A great cigar is an even greater soliloquy.
That stated, pairings are nice. My living room is furnished in the Early American Poverty design. Another design is Eclectic, wherein you purchase what speaks to your eye and somehow it all miraculously fits, if not matches -- think this, gentlepersons, whenst thinking pairing. Too, there is such a phenomenon as "on-the-nose." Don't pair a coffee primary cigar offering with coffee. Perhaps look deeper than the stick's primary and see a chocolate middling note that can use a hand. Perhaps then go hot cocoa. In a Superman mug, ya nut ya! You get the gist. Wines are great for pulling out subtle fruits. Manischewitz cannot be beat.
Also, think to music or other entertainment and food and and friends and all other ambience for pairing potentialities. But always use a well placed comma in lieu of "and" over and over and...
OK. Enough on a topic which volumes can and have been wrote on, and by better gentlepersons than I.
Construction: The level of craftsmanship. The mechanics of that: Draw, ash, packing, etc.
Combustion: The burn, its line, and it's smoke-output at each end -- off the foot and into smoke-hole.
Flavors/Body: All about the palate. What I taste draw to finish and how it mouth-feels and finishes. Also, complexity/nuances.
Strength: Nicotine, gentlepersons. How loopy one might get.
That stated, pairings are nice. My living room is furnished in the Early American Poverty design. Another design is Eclectic, wherein you purchase what speaks to your eye and somehow it all miraculously fits, if not matches -- think this, gentlepersons, whenst thinking pairing. Too, there is such a phenomenon as "on-the-nose." Don't pair a coffee primary cigar offering with coffee. Perhaps look deeper than the stick's primary and see a chocolate middling note that can use a hand. Perhaps then go hot cocoa. In a Superman mug, ya nut ya! You get the gist. Wines are great for pulling out subtle fruits. Manischewitz cannot be beat.
Also, think to music or other entertainment and food and and friends and all other ambience for pairing potentialities. But always use a well placed comma in lieu of "and" over and over and...
OK. Enough on a topic which volumes can and have been wrote on, and by better gentlepersons than I.
K A P L O W I T Z SCALE
K being the least, Z the greatest
Appearance: How the stick looks, 'natch. Pre-light to nubbing - and all points betwixt; visually.Construction: The level of craftsmanship. The mechanics of that: Draw, ash, packing, etc.
Combustion: The burn, its line, and it's smoke-output at each end -- off the foot and into smoke-hole.
Flavors/Body: All about the palate. What I taste draw to finish and how it mouth-feels and finishes. Also, complexity/nuances.
Strength: Nicotine, gentlepersons. How loopy one might get.
Can you see how some of these over-lap? Good. Also: I begin on "O" and grade up or down as needed throughout, or at designated times as indicated.
ACT I
Appearance W
Construction O
Combustion O
Flavors/Body I
Strength L
Construction O
Combustion O
Flavors/Body I
Strength L
ACT II
Appearance I
Construction O
Combustion O
Flavors/Body I
Strength O
ACT III
Appearance L
Construction O
Combustion O
Flavors/Body O
Strength W
FINAL GRADE
****B****
We'll actually be talking a lot about this (Final Grade writ large, not the Padron's B) on Radio Herf 03272016. Check yer local listings.
For now's sake, I begin each offering on an "A" grading and adjust accordingly as the play plays out. A+ is achieved via no down-ticks and if I release, at anytime whilst smoking, and audible "Wow." Anything below B, I cannot recommend. That stated, any A grade is akin to me saying ya gotta try this. Try these.
EPILOGUE
Another nod toward fellow reviewers. Don't review a stick, any stick, fresh from the mailbox. Allow it its rest. To those shipping review sticks: be prepared for these schmucks. Pack in decent bags with decent hydration.
I believe you, Dear Reader, now have the gist of my M.O.. If you'll excuse me -- it is Purim, and I'm a tick Manishewitz'd -- but the laundering of one's underwear waits for no gentleperson.
Purim Sameach!!!
I believe you, Dear Reader, now have the gist of my M.O.. If you'll excuse me -- it is Purim, and I'm a tick Manishewitz'd -- but the laundering of one's underwear waits for no gentleperson.