Deep in flavor. Deep in your mind.


Weekly Horse Racing Review for June 20, 2016 - Isabela Firecracker

Isabela Firecracker
4x42 Petite Corona Pig-tail Barber-pole
w. Ecuadorian Maduro // Ecuadorian DesFlorada
b./f. Nicaraguan Media-Tiempo

Spot of Tea
Twinings Earl Grey
Sprinkling of Stevia
Isabela, as I have stated each and every time I've writ about this fine brand, uses sugar to affix its caps. It's OK, purist gentlepersons. They are not flavored, nor are they infused, and this is a time honored method. Here in the company's Firecracker offering, that extra sugar zetz is at its most caramelized and deepest darkest. Which is in nice balance to why it lives up completely, to its Firecracker moniker. Jalapeno, habanero, bell, banana, and every other number of peppers I can't possibly weak-gut stomach, are on immediate and prominent display. Too, the deeper shade of sugar brings up a more toasted vanilla note -- another flavor bit Isabela is known for. It's a real smack in the mouf, this.

Undefeated three year-old filly, Songbird, rolled on in Saturday’s GII Summertime Oaks by 6 1/2 lengths under jock Mr. Mike Smith. So much, gentlepersons, for the idea of ring-rust being an inhibitor, since she hadn't run since the GI Santa Anita Oaks on April 9th. How good is this horse? The sky doth remain the limit right up until it ain't. As for what's next, we can turn to what her trainer Jerry Hollendorfer offered:

“I don’t know about facing males [in the Grade I Haskell, 1 1/8 miles on July 31 at Monmouth Park]. Mr. Porter likes having input on these things so we’ll talk it over and make a plan, see what happens. I wouldn’t think we’d go to the Haskell, but there are plenty of races for her and we’ve talked about several of them ... I think we’ll stick with the girls for now and see what happens.”

As to Saturday's day at the track, we'll again turn to Mr. Hollendorfer with:

“I was very happy the way she looked going down the backside. She was very comfortable, with her ears up, looking for something. The opportunity presented itself to be just a little off the pace and now we’ve shown everyone we can do that." Fractions on the race were 22.97, 45.95, 1:10.28 and 1:35.71. 

Mouth-feel is a liquid tingle of perfect moisture levels. Ash is shiny pale grey via lotsa crystals. The shaft burns hot but not quick -- lively. It's a lot like what Bukowski makes Mexican cigarettes sound like. A dynamic and nigh charismatic fuse bursting with and to, life. Ballpark peanuts come on in at the end of the opening act.
Shall we continue with the ladies? Lettuce, gentlepersons. Breeders' Cup Mile victor Tepin overcame many a potential impediment to gain the June 14th Queen Anne win in the opening race of The Royal Ascot. Impediments, ya ask? I shall tells ya: no Lasix, straight course, soft ground, against the boys, and uphill -- both ways... okay, one way. Still though, oy vey iz mir. The tsuris!

Switching gears for a tick, in my ever-so-humble opining, I find 5 Vegas offerings to pair perfectly with the sweet science of pugilism. Isabela does so with the ponies. Especially on the turf, as lush grass grows in the middling of this Firecracker. Lotsa smoke in the smoke-hole and off the teeny footsie. Big white clouds laced with sweet exotic spices, gentlepersons. The tobacco is not forefront, but a faraway backdrop of an aromatic tobacco canvas. By the way: please pinch off each and every pig-tailed offering thou art privy to. It's what Hashem and the roller doth want of ya.

The five year-old mare moves, then, her record to twelve wins of twenty starts and is 15-10-3-0 on turf. Tepin could be headed to The Woodbine Mile next, as well as was mentioned, a trip to Dubai next year. She has now shown an ability to ship and carry form without Lasix.
Line on the Isabela is dead even. Construction softens a tick off light, but has well by now ceased. Draw is quick and easy with the least slightest bit of tension. Pecan vibing in now, candied not by the aforementioned sugar, but by an inherent sweetness pulled up from the tobacco which braces a heightening exotic spice melange. The Earl Grey is making this Firecracker the taste equivalent of attending a Salvadore Dali showing on acid. My palate and tongue have road rash, but gentlepersons, I ain't complainin'. Profile is a medium+. Strength? Drop the +. Notes liquefy to a high and excitable viscosity.

[editor: I am well aware this is 'old' pony news. Are you (now) well aware, gentlepersons, I ain't never claimed to be a breaking news source? So's we understand one-another.]
At four inches long, a la Mr. Trump's small hands, the final act is essentially the nub and whilst hot to the mitt, it's cool to my pleasantly bombarded smoke-hole. This thing begs Quarter Horse races. Maybe the hounds. Because when I go to the dogs, I expect two things: to smoke quick and lose moolah just as. This Isabela offering got me covered in the first and I've a knack for the second all on my lonesome. Lotsa smoke. Construction and combustion hold fast. Strength found that there +. Very vanilla and verily every insanity pepper known to personkind, gentlepersons. What a kick in the tuchus! With my Earl Grey and Firecracker in hand, I feel like a member of Parliament. The one whom pays his 'mistresses' a bit more to 'ruffle his wig.'

"Who has been the best of American racing through the first half of 2016? Below, you will find my opinions on the best of the best. Note that I’ve only included horses that have run this year. While some of these categories are dominated by one or two horses, such as the Older Males, Older Females, 3yo Fillies and Turf Horses, making heads or tails of our sprinters is near impossible. Things are sure to shake out more as we move through the summer, and I look forward to adding 2yo lists in the near future, but for now, these are our best as I see them." Brian Zipse,  from Zipse at the Track (Read ZATT daily, gentlepersons.)

[editor: I took the top pony of each category and offered up a fine cigar pairing.]

OLDER DIRT MALE: California Chrome - Isabela True Cuban-sized Corona
THREE YEAR-OLD MALE: Nyquist - La Aurora 107
OLDER DIRT FEMALE: Beholder - Leaf by Oscar
THREE YEAR-OLD FEMALE: Songbird - La Gloria Cubana Medaille d'Or No. 1
TURF HORSE: Tepin - Fallen Angel
SPRINTER: X Y Jet - La Aurora Untamed

Candied pecans soar on the shoulders of a newly intro'd greased suede. Workboot. Ah, yes, the help has arrived. I shall have milk toast to mend my tastebuds and a hand to my seat, kind sir. Actually, I was so beside myself at the Firecrackers end, that I snubbed it out in my $0.99 Walmart tray and ran around the block four times in a dead sprint, screaming fight songs of colleges I never attended. Or even heard of. Sadly, this left me with no finishing photograph of the Isabela offering. Instead, I'll post a stock ad image at the end of this post.

K being the least, Z the greatest
Appearance I
Construction W
Combustion W
Flavors/Body T
Strength  W